Pacheco, o conde otimista e a Copa
17/03/14 00:36Amigo torcedor, amigo secador, é chegada a hora de conversar com o conde Afonso Celso, que ainda em 1900, publicou o seu genial “Porque Me Ufano do Meu País”, assim mesmo em nacionalíssimo apelo brasuca.
Genial porque o absurdo também é fruto do gênio, ora pois, desde que o gênio esteja exposto também ao nosso brasileiríssimo sarro ou tiração de onda, como me alerta aqui o Marcelo D2.
O certo é que o velho conde, quase um século antes da publicidade nacionalista e boleira, inventou o pachequismo, a arte de ver ou país ou torcer como o Pacheco da propaganda das lâminas de barbear –ironia da história é que a pachecada publicitária ocorre justamente em 1982, quando nem carecíamos tanto dessa onda da pátria em chuteiras e perdemos do mesmo jeito etc.
A função técnica cameloística, digamos assim, com todo perdão aos respeitáveis camelôs expulsos pela força bruta e nada cristã do rapa, era vender gillete sob o apelo cívico contra o novo vira-latismo que se instaurara de 1970 até aquela data.
Continuemos na antropologia rasa, afinal de contas boiar no mar é de graça, como canta minha amiga Karina Buhr. Donde o conde foi nosso Pacheco I.
Mas quem primeiro brincou com a máxima do conde, comparando o livro patriótico aos piores momentos do “Brejal dos guajas”, do acadêmico José Sarney, foi o Millôr Fernandes, ainda nos anos 1980, na velha “Veja”. Daniel Piza, que nos deixou precocemente, usou o bordão, com uma negativa marcante, na sua coluna no novíssimo “Estadão” nos anos 2000.
É preciso, neste ano de Copa, reler o conde. É o que tenho feito, depois de ganhar uma cópia de minha amante bibliófila da rua do Ouvidor, brotinho que curte paradoxos e livros antigos. Foi durante uma cerveja crepuscular com o amigo Marechal, na toca do Baiacu, que ela irrompeu do vizinho sebo “Folha Seca” com o presente crepitando no celofane. Que bonito é.
O conde dizia assim:
“Quando disserdes “Somos brasileiros!”, levantai a cabeça, transbordantes de nobre ufania. Deveis agradecer todo dia a Deus o haver Ele vos outorgado por berço o Brasil.
A flora brasileira é maravilhosamente rica, dado aí se juntarem todas as flores e frutas do universo.
Negros, brancos, peles-vermelhas, mestiços, vivem aqui em abundância e paz.”
Antes de Gilberto Freyre, como lembrou o Piza, foi o monarquista que louvou a tal da democracia racial.
Esqueceu apenas de avisar, mais de um século depois, aos brasileiros que frequentam estádios de futebol, bares, boates, feiras livres, shoppings antirrolezinhos etc.
Esqueceu de avisar à tal justiça desportiva, seja do Rio Grande do Sul ou de qualquer parte dos tristes trópicos, que 30 patacas e mando de campo é apenas rubricar, subscrever e assinar em branco –com trocadilho mesmo!- a aprovação ao ato de injúria racial sofrida pelo juiz Márcio Chagas.
*crônica publicada na versão impressa desta mesma Folha.
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Lendo esta crônica, lembrei de um personagem da escolinha do professor Raimundo, do genial Chico Anysio, chamado Brasilino Roxo, interpretado pelo Benvindo Siqueira, que era super ufanista. Saudade de gente genial como o Chico.Bons tempos…
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Xico Sá, eu amo sua crônicas! Você tem um jeito rico de escrever! Juro que as vezes leio com sotaque nordestino, coisa que perdi nova, rs. você é uma das minhas inspirações para seguir a carreira de jornalista! Parabéns pelo seu dom! Um cheiro!
Gracias, patricia. assim me animo! bjo