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10 razões para crer no fim do mundo em 2012

Por xicosa
10/05/12 11:10

Neymar e o estilo metrossexual-cafuçu

I -A gostosa tipo nova classe C, a gostosa-gostosa que faz operário delirar no andaime, está de volta na TV, vide “Avenida Brasil”. Viva a fartura.

II -Fim da maldição. Como previu meu corvo Edgar, a ave agourenta e secadora, o Corinthians avançou na Libertadores da América. Pega o time do freguês e heroico português.

III -Foi preciso uma mulher assumir a Presidência para falar grosso contra a política de juros. No que me fez lembrar o velho Brecht: “O que é roubar um banco diante de fundar um banco?”

IV -A Justiça brasileira, via STF, devolveu terra a índio, depois de 512 anos da chegada de Cabral. Foi lá na Bahia, perto do marco do descobrimento.

V -A depilação definitiva e o movimento das sem-pelo chegaram para ficar. O estio Claudia Ohana é apenas uma “Playboy” amarelada no baú. E como dói.

VI -O famigerado (eis meu adjetivo predileto na política!) auxílio-paletó, que representava o 14º e 15º salários dos parlamentares, foi extinto ontem pelo Senado. Macacos me mordam! Valia desde 1946. O milagre começou com reportagem de João Valadares no “Correio Braziliense”.

VII – Ricardo Teixeira deixou o comando da CBF depois de 24 anos. Tudo bem, a entidade continua a Sucupira ludopédica de sempre, agora sob o poder paulista, mas já foi um fenômeno.

VIII – Quando todos os apocalípticos previam o fim da TV diante da internet, as redes sociais sucumbiram e hoje não passam de uma gigantesca sala coletiva de ver televisão. De cada 10 temas do twitter ou do facebook, nove têm origem nos telepatas.

IX -O Brasil esquece o Fome Zero e vira o país da alta gastronomia. Os cursos superiores do gênero são tão concorridos quanto a Medicina, como já testemunhamos em Pernambuco. Alex Atala e biscoito fino para as massas.

X -O metrossexualismo, mesmo na sua versão cafuçu à moda do gênio Neymar Jr., domina a cena. Perdeu, macho-jurubeba, perdeu.

Algumas outras razões para apostar no apocalipse dos Maias, amigos?

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